Skyfire's Remorse
by Transformer-Slash
Summary: Skyfire truly loves Starscream, but when he finally shows him all he can feel is remorse. G1 Skyfire/Starscream. Implied Starscream/Megatron and Starscream/other decepticons. Oneshot. Plug-and-play. Nonconsensual.


This fanfiction is one of the first Transformer fics I posted and I've really never gotten over how much I hate it. That aside, I faced down some writing demons today by implementing the brilliant editing expertise of my girlfriend. She managed to correct my grammar mistakes which are both frequent and glaring. So, to anyone who read this fic in its raw state and was shocked by how badly written it was- you should have said something, fuckers.

Warnings: Non-consensual plug-n-play between Skyfire and Starscream. If you don't like it read it and tell me WHY you don't like it with as many swear words as possible.

Love you~

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Skyfire had been sent on patrol. It seemed that one another of the Autobots always had to be 'on patrol'. However, what patrolling meant seemed to be up to individual interpretation. For Bumblebee, it meant tooling around with Spike and company. For Ironhide, it meant looking for a fight. For Skyfire, it was an excuse to find Starscream. Most of the Decepticons never left their lair except to steal energy. Starscream, on the other hand, left at least once a day to fly around. Not a 'patrol', just a flight, for the freedom of it. It was not long before Skyfire spotted the red seeker, yet to be alerted to his presence. Skyfire landed to perform 'surveillance'.

Starscream was in jet mode, the fastest way to fly. However, speed didn't seem to be his concern. He dropped and dived wildly, like some sort of drunken dance. He performed a tight barrel roll, coming out in robot mode. He stopped a moment to hover, impossibly high up, the air whistling around him. Then he dived, his chassis heating up with incredible speed as he dropped out of the air. Skyfire watched as he fell further and faster. A horrible thought struck him. What if Starscream didn't pull up? He was not over water, and a crash landing from that height would offline him for sure. Starscream just kept falling, for what seemed too long.

Skyfire's turbines activated again as Starscream pulled out less then ten feet from the ground. Skyfire realized the cliff face he was holding onto now had his hand prints cracked into it. Starscream had transformed back into jet mode and was screaming full speed upward. When he reached a certain altitude he spun into robot mode. His bizarre dance continued. He spun gracefully, as if waltzing. Skyfire watched, fascinated. He wondered what could possibly be going through Starscream's processors.

Starscream was aware of being watched, but it didn't surprise him. It wasn't the first time that he had been seen while out flying. The other Decepticons knew where he went, just in case he was needed for a mission. Usually his aeronautic display would halt the instant he felt optics on him, but not today. Today, he just wanted to keep 'dancing'. He had never really known a word for what he did until coming to Earth, but he had notice the similarity between what he did in the air, and what the less clumsy of the humans did on their feet.

Skyfire wanted to call out to Starscream. He had watched him many times, but he had never seen him fly with such grace, in such strange patterns. It was beautiful. Skyfire's spark twisted painfully. The Starscream that flew above him was so like the one he had loved all those years ago. It was almost as if the war had never changed him.

Starscream stopped suddenly. Now he was getting annoyed. When would the spy watching him get that he wasn't going to do anything interesting? There was not a slagging thing worth reporting to Prime, so why weren't they leaving?

Skyfire stiffened. Why did Starscream stop? Had he noticed Skyfire watching him? Skyfire didn't want to fight. He didn't think he could even muster the will to hit Starscream.

"Are you quite finished?" Starscream's voice was projected over the wind. He had turned toward where Skyfire was hiding. "I don't know who you think you are, but I am trying to be alone."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to bother you," he replied. Then he realized his mistake as Starscream came plummeting out of the sky, landing in a small crater just feet from Skyfire.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Starscream snapped angrily.

"I-I was just on patrol," Skyfire stuttered.

"Trying to spy on me?" Starscream spat. "Going to go back to your autobot friends and tell them all about my little show, huh?"

"No!" Skyfire was on his feet now, ready to defend himself if he had to. "I just was trying to figure out what you were doing."

"Skyfire, get out of here," Starscream hissed. "What I do is no longer you concern."

"Starscream…" Skyfire mumbled sadly, "I only wanted to see you, for old time's sake." Skyfire was too busy staring at his feet to notice Starscream's body tense. Suddenly Starscream had sprung forward. Before Skyfire had time to think their lips were interlocked. It was a moment before Skyfire got over his shock enough to realize what had happened. The kiss became urgent and feverish, full of a wanting that reawakened in Skyfire. He'd wanted this. Primus, he'd wanted this! Had Starscream finally come to his senses?

"Skyfire," Starscream slowly pulled himself out of the kiss. Then Skyfire felt a sharp pain as Starscream kneed him in the chest. "The old times are dead." Starscream said flatly, letting Skyfire drop down in shock and pain. "Do yourself a huge favor, and forget me." Skyfire had stood up as Starscream walked away. He saw Starscream's legs tense as he was ready to jump into the air. Something snapped.

"It doesn't _work_ like that!" Skyfire shouted as he tackled Starscream to the ground. Starscream groaned, bewildered at the sudden impact, sensors going off in his screen of vision that indicated he'd just crashed. Skyfire dragged him to his feet by one arm, and turned Starscream to face him.

"You want a fight, Autobot?" Starscream screeched, trying to think of a way to escape the much larger mech that now had him clutched helplessly by both arms.

"No," Skyfire said with anger harsh in his voice. "I never wanted a fight. I'm a scientist, not a fighter. You know that better than anyone." Skyfire's optics blazed as he searched Starscream's face for any emotion besides rage. There was nothing to see but a twisted snarl.

"Let me go!" Starscream yelled. "If you damage so much as one wire, Megatron will turn you into scrap. You slagging Autobot scum! I wish we had never found you in the ice!" Starscream's voice cracked, as he realized how pointless his struggling was.

"Don't mention Megatron around me." Skyfire's voice dripped with rage, "Megatron doesn't care about you. I do. I love you!"

"You know they say if you love something you'll let it go," Starscream said snidely.

"_They_ also say that Autobots should capture Decepticons and imprison them at headquarters whenever possible," Skyfire shot back. "A lot of slagging good _their_ advice is." Starscream's optics widened in fear. He didn't want to be taken to Autobot headquarters. There was no telling what the Autobot's would do to him.

"D-do your worst," Starscream said, not quite ready to grovel for his life. "Megatron will-"

"Megatron will do nothing!" Skyfire shouted. His temper had gotten the better of him. It was too much. Starscream braced for impact. It came in the form of a rock wall to his back. Skyfire didn't slam him terribly hard, but a quick jolt of pain made Starscream cry out. Skyfire lifted Starscream's arms above his head and held him by his wrists.

"What do you think you're doing?" Starscream's voice was shrill and full of panic. Starscream had a dark feeling he knew exactly what Skyfire was doing. Rape was nothing new to Starscream. His fellow Decepticons had done it more than once before Megatron claimed him personally. With Skyfire it seemed surreal, a good-hearted Autobot, an Autobot that he had once been with willingly, about to take him by force.

"If you won't accept that I love you, I'll just have to show you." Skyfire placed a hand over Starscream's cockpit. Starscream shuddered, his spark recognized the hand of his former lover and Starscream felt his cockpit window sliding easily aside against his will. His body betrayed him completely.

"N-no, not there," Starscream whimpered. Skyfire intended to connect to his Spark port, a violation much deeper than connecting to his lower port. Skyfire would be able to reach into Starscream's memories and emotions, not only overload him with energy. "Skyfire, you can't! P-please!"

"It's the only way to make you understand," Skyfire said simply. He took a moment to caress Starscream's frame with his free hand. He slowly pulled it down the side of Starscream's chest, brushing the sensitive plating over his groin. He then moved it slowly over one wing. Starscream's turbines began to cycle faster. His wings were the most sensitive part of him, to pain or pleasure.

"I don't- no!" Starscream became incoherent, mumbling half-sparked protests. Skyfire finally stopped teasing, and pulled out his interface cable. He slipped it into the port right next to Starscream's spark.

"Aaaah!" Starscream cried out, his body becoming overwhelmed with extra electric current. Starscream was unable to protest when his own cable was plugged into to Skyfire. The intensity of feeling hit them both. Starscream was barely aware that his hands had been freed. Skyfire now held Starscream closely to his chest.

'I love you.' The words reverberated inside the feeling, inside memories, and a swirl of remorse and longing. These were Skyfire's thoughts, feelings, and memories. It was everything that Skyfire was. He was pouring through a connection formed by force.

"STOP!" Starscream threw his head back and screamed. It was too much. He felt liquid welling up at the corners of his optics. Skyfire loved him so much, too much, more then he deserved. Starscream tried to stop the rush of feeling he was returning. He knew what his memories would read; how soiled everything about him was. Skyfire was taking it from him.

"Starscream, don't hold back," Skyfire whispered. Starscream couldn't contain it any longer. In a burst everything he was blasted through to Skyfire causing both to overload.

Starscream clutched weakly to Skyfire for a long while, sobbing. He had never hated himself more than he did in that moment. Not after he had given himself up to so many others, none had actually made a complete connection with him. He'd never felt more violated.

"Starscream… I'm sorry." Skyfire could think of nothing else to say. It was so unfair. The Starscream he'd known, whose spark had been so pure and sweet, was not entirely gone. It was well hidden behind a mass of scars that would not heal. Starscream had been used one too many times, and it had broken him.

"Don't you dare apologize!" Starscream felt a rage well up inside him with so much anger and indignity that he hardly comprehended. "Don't you slagging apologize! If you regret what you just did then why'd you do it? I begged you not to you piece of scrap!" Starscream stood up and began taking steps back. "I hate you!" Starscream transformed into a jet and the air screeched and sizzled where he had been.

Skyfire buried his head in his hands. All he felt now was remorse.


End file.
